Ever spent an afternoon being dragged around SoHo while your wife shops for shoes? Ever wonder why the fuck there isn’t a single bar in the neighbourhood where you could relax? Me too. I don’t imagine this problem will be addressed in our lifetime but here’s the next best thing: a handy map to mental salvation… starting with a monstrous pastrami sandwich:
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A. Katz Deli – “New York’s Oldest and Best Delicatessen.” Suggested order: pastrami sandwich , a pickle on the side and a lemonade
B. Cake Shop – Café and noise rock venue. Suggested order: desert and coffee
C. Max Fish – Former Alleged Gallery social club. Suggested order: bottle of Bud
D. Slipper Room – David Lynchian burlesque bar. Suggested order: either a whiskey or a Coors… depends on what the ladies look like
E. Mason Dixon – Southern themed frat party complete with mechanical bull. Suggested order: shot and a beer
F. East Side Company Bar – Fancy pants speakeasy owned by the Milk and Honey people. Look for the door through a sheet of plywood beside the alleyway… there’s a small brass plate engraved with the address. Suggested order: an Old Fashioned, or something else suitably classy
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